Done.

It's over. On Monday my now ex came over to "talk things out" because we'd been having issues. I said hello and gave him a kiss. He came inside my apartment, took off his shoes and his coat, and then sat next to me on the couch. We sat in silence for a good 10 seconds before I asked him what was going on. His face screwed around for a bit, like he didn't want to say what he was going to say, and then it came. "We can't be together anymore." No talking, no crying, no fighting, no nothing. He then asked me "Is there anything you want to say?" I had compiled a list of things that day, thinking I could actually to him about them, but they didn't matter if it was all over anyway. I told him exactly that. I knew it had been over days before when he said he didn't think I was the person he was meant to be with. So what if he didn't "let me down gently" psh. As if he's capable of such a thing. He had the audacity to say "I still have feelings for you" before he left. Yeah, great to know. I seriously doubt that he has the emotional capacity to love anyone or anything but himself. This one's for you, ex-lover. 

"Cold As You" Taylor Swift.

And when you take, you take the very best of me.
So I start a fight 'cause I need to feel somethin'
And you do what you want 'cause I'm not what you wanted.

Oh, what a shame.
What a rainy ending given to a perfect day.
Just walk away, no use defending words that you will never say.
And now that I'm sittin' here thinkin' it through, I've never been anywhere cold as you.

You put up walls and paint them all a shade of gray.
And I stood there lovin' you and washed them all away.
And you come away with a great little story of a mess of a dreamer with the nerve to adore you.

Oh, what a shame.
What a rainy ending given to a perfect day.
So just walk away, no use defending words that you will never say.
And now that I'm sittin' here thinkin' it through, I've never been anywhere cold as you.

You never did give a damn thing, honey.
But I cried, cried for you.
And I know you wouldn't have told nobody if I died, died for you.
(Died for you)

Oh, what a shame.
What a rainy ending give to a perfect day. Every smile you fake is so condescending. 
Counted all the scars you made. 
Now that I'm sittin her thinkin' it through, I've never been anywhere cold as you

love?

Valentine's Day was yesterday. My relationship has been extremely rocky lately, and nothing has been done to change that. This uncertainty has been tearing me apart. So, I found a song to post about what's been happening. It's a blast from the past, but it fits so well into the situation I find myself in that I can't help but fall in love with No Doubt all over again. Some of Gwen Stefani's new stuff I might not like so much, but there is no denial about the raw truths that she sings about so beautifully in this song. I need strength, and this song does that for me. 

You and me 
We used to be together
Every day together always 

I really feel 
That I'm losing my best friend
I can't believe 
This could be the end 

It looks as though you're letting go
And if it's real, 
Well I don't want to know 

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining 
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons 
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts 

Our memories
They can be inviting
But some are altogether 
Mighty frightening 

As we die, both you and I 
With my head in my hands 
I sit and cry 

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining 
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts no no no
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
And I don't need your reasons 
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts 

It's all ending,
I gotta stop pretending who we are... 

You and me 
I can see us dying... are we? 

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining 
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts no no
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
And I don't need your reasons 
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts
I know what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't speak don't speak don't speak 
No I know what you're thinking
And I don't need your reasons
I know you good I know you good
I know you real good oh 

La la la la la la la la la
Don't don't ooh ooh
Hush hush darling
Hush hush darling
Hush hush don't tell me 'cause it hurts
Hush hush darling
Hush hush darling
Hush hush don't tell me 'cause it hurts